#this is honestly my most ambitious project

[bloopitynoot]

My board for Molly's coat!

I am excited to get cracking on this because it really is going to be a ton of embroidery work (I am an embroidery artist) AND I'm going to be making this with my partner.

I've been traching Sky how to sew (and embroider) so we will be tackling this together; she will be cosplaying Molly!

We're starting with simplicity pattern 8482 A for the base with some modifications;

No zipper

Maybe clasps?

The bottom will be cut into 4 panels for flair

Removing the sleeves and turning them into tied patchwork sleeves

Adding a second dramatic sleeve

And so so much embroidery

Goals this weekend will be to come up with a fabric purchasing plan and organizing a trip to the fabric shop in the near future.

[t8oo]

there is some symbolism iv never considered in that one episod of pt5 where zenigata rescues fujiko before she kills lupin

[argus223]

Oki... so first time this week i am not workin on my english final... sooo to take a break from writing, i am now going to.... continue to work on the video script i have in the background... why am i like this?

[arolesbianism]

Oh oxygen not included printing pod we're rly in it now

[sun-flower-children]

Academic Rivals! Viktor x Reader

Academy Student!Viktor x gn!Reader

Here's my take on this idea that has been rumbling around my brain especially with all the new viktor fics ( yall are doing the lords work)

not proof read + a lot longer than I thought it would be, sorry lmao

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You were the Academy's top student known to be the top of the class with the highest scores always exceeding expectations.

Your creative thinking and problem solving is what normally got you the spotlight of attention within academia.

Naturally after spending your first two years of the Academy eating up the attention and receiving offers from multiple elite members of society, industry and government certainly made your resume/reputation an intimidating one.

Your peers knew you to be competitive and ambitious wanting to be the one to set the curve; extensive research projects, etc.

This did however make you a poor teammate with your passionate ideas that one of them could dream of keeping up with you. Plus you would steal the leadership role from them to implement the changes you'd want.

You had gotten used to pattern created for you with a bright future ahead.

Even if you were getting kind of bored of knowing that your worst idea would still allow you to keep your rank.

Then all the sudden a new student joins the Academy

It didn't bother you much until you started seeing a drop in your scores and ranking thus creating a rivalry with this mysterious student.

It was not until you and Viktor shared a class that you realized who your academic opponent was

Thus starting a new chapter of your academic career with renewed passion upon knowing there was finally someone that could equal you in skill.

Fighting for everything within the academic realm that was available

Now neither of you had ever officially been introduced or carried a proper conversation instead replacing regular communication with pointed looks of smugness or confidence.

You would have angry fits in private realizing the margin that you had lost to Viktor

Long days and nights spent gaining a potential advantage over your rival.

Your friends would point out how you would almost pop a vein just describing the way that he would "usurp the first place on an exam all because of a technicality"

Honestly when you would get really into it you were sure that you hated this guy: coming out of nowhere with no prior history and just takes over everything you have worked hard to establish.

Who does he think he is????

Now all your professors, namely Himerdinger paid close attention to this rivalry. It's entertaining watching your top 2 students hash it out and creating things they would not have without this push.

Himerdinger seeing how honed in your other skills were decided to create a project for the class specifically targeting you both.

A partnered project

One that could not change neither the topic, the partner or the day that it was to be presented; everything set in stone.

" Learning the skills needed in a lab is one thing but the most important and impactful discoveries have always been those created through teamwork." Himerdinger would share one fateful day as he put up the paper listing the groups.

It did not even cross your mind that you would have been paired with Viktor and after looking at the poster turned around a looked at him.

Viktor was still sitting in his front row seat in the lecture room patiently waiting for the crowd to dissipate before getting up to look at the paper.

He continued to wrap up whatever notes he had taken as you step up to him.

"We are assigned partners for this project." you say very matter a factly.

Viktor looks up to you with a small smile," Well then, we should set up times to work on the project together. What times work best for you?"

You were taken aback by his nonchalance.

Did he really not care that he was partnered with you? Did he not see you as significant enough to mention the obvious tension? Did he not even see you as a rival but a regular student below him???

After a short pause you share what time you are normally at the library.

As you share the details he finished packing up his stuff.

Looking back up to with another slightly bigger smile (what is his game???) " I'll see you then. Tomorrow at table four."

With that he leans on his cane and leaves you in the quiet empty classroom to deliberate your next moves.

That night you started working on the project creating multiple schemes, ideas, and conceptual ideas that could be used for the project put forth.

You went to bed hoping to finally force him to recognize you as the rival that you were as he seemed so dismissive before.

You showed up to the library at the arranged time to see Viktor sitting peacefully at a study table thumbing through multiple volumes seemingly looking for a specific piece of information.

"Good Morning." you started as you walked up to him.

Without even looking up he returns the same early day greeting and places yet another volume aside and opening a new one.

Raising an eyebrow that the attitude you place your things on the other side of the table.

"I was thinking last night about this project and had written down some ideas that I believe that we should pick from as our approach." you open the discussion with no changed behavior from your supposed teammate.

You continue, " I have already taken the liberty to research them, for your convenience, and have supplied preliminary data for each one. Honestly any of these would resolve the problem raised by our projects prompt with their main difference being how creative you wanted to get with it."

Viktor has created yet another pile of abandoned books that didn't meet his mysterious criteria all the while not regarding you properly.

Your felt your self becoming more warmer as you felt the irritation pool into the oil pit of anger you have created surrounding him.

"It's considered polite to respond or at the very least acknowledge when someone is talking to you. Or are you so focused on your book hunt you aren't ever looking at the person you are supposed to be completing this project with."

Viktor sighs putting the book currently in his possession down and looks up to you.

"It was not my intention to be rude I am just looking for a specific volume that has a unique perspective on the concept we learned a week ago but the title is slipping my mind."

Sighing you sit down and observe the collection of books created on the table.

"I'm going to go on a limb here and assume that you only really remember that the color of the book was dark blue?"

Viktor chuckled," Observant and yes I am."

"Well you aren't going to find it in the library considering there is only one copy of it. That author's take was considered almost heretic."

"Ah, so you are familiar with the book I am referencing?"

"It would be strange if I didn't considering that I brought it with me to our meeting. I checked it out a week ago because it piqued my interest and also happened to align with this assignment."

You hold it out over the table as Viktor sighs again running a hand through his hair.

The meeting ended up going on for longer than expected.

You were surprised to find that he has a similar perspective to yours and understood your vision from the multiple proposals that you had created.

Further analysis showed some minor flaws that would otherwise be overlooked by other people; but neither of you too were not going to settle for anything less than perfection.

The more that the two of you poured over ideas, equations, concepts, and plans until you came up with a path that pleased you both with only one variable that needing some testing.

Viktor offered to go his smaller private study that he had already set up a similar experiment (he was also trying ideas out the night before)

Walking side by side down the hallways was a strange feeling.

Not because you were walking slower that your default rushed walking pace but because this person that you had, honestly, really hated and rationalized that was cheating somehow....wasn't.

You hated to admit it as you continued to listen to his rambling on of the missing component that they needed to figure out.

(Shit...he is actually just naturally brilliant)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

part 1 | part 2 >

[lonelywretchjervistetch]

The State Birds Initiative - Introduction

Before I do ANYTHING else, and before you read anything else...let's start this with a little poll, shall we?

...Look, I'm an overly ambitious person by nature. It's a problem, I'm fully aware. So, in the midst of writing character essays, imagining my own version of the DC Cinematic Universe (I promise, I will return to the Legion of Super-Heroes series; been having writer's block, not gonna lie), and about a dozen other projects that don't include school and my job (one and the same thing, and I love both, but I'll get to that one day)...I had another thought. That I would like to present to the good people of Tumblr (and perhaps beyond).

The state birds suck.

Most people on Tumblr don't know this about me, save for a select few that no me in real life (hey guys, 'sup), but I'm an avid birdwatcher, and am currently working in ornithology as a profession and student. As such, and as a former (and future) teacher, I have a vested passion in spreading the word. And one of the first ways most of us in the United States engage with birds, other than through the world and people around us, is through our national bird and state birds. Oh, and for anybody reading this not from the USA, don't worry, national birds are included here, too.

Now, in case you don't know for whatever reason, each one of the states in the United States has a bird meant to represent the state, designated by the government and often nominated by the state's citizens. This tradition started in 1926, with Kentucky's national bird, the Northern Cardinal (Cardinalis cardinalis). Now, most states have an official state bird, although Pennsylvania technically has a state game bird, rather than a state bird. We'll get to it. But in any case, there's a bird associated with every state.

But, uh...most of them suuuuuuuuuuuck.

Now, for example, I'm not saying that the Northern Cardinal sucks. Far from it! I love cardinals, and honestly, who doesn't? They're handsome birds, they have a lot of character, they're recognizable in most states in the Union by most people. I love them! But, uh...cardinals are extremely overused as state birds. Kentucky chose them as their state bird first, and were followed by Illinois, Indiana, Ohio, North Carolina, West Virginia, and Virginia. That's ridiculous. Also, wait, really, Virginia? You saw that West Virginia had it already, and STILL went for the cardinal? What the hell?

But why? Maybe there's a good reason for all of those states to choose the cardinal, after all. Obviously, it's present in all of those states, because...well, the Northern Cardinal is basically everywhere. But other than that, why? Well, let's see.

Kentucky: Unclear, but it's likely because of its prevalence, songs, and nonmigratory behavior, at least according to some sources; there isn't a lot of evidence online as to why outside of this.

Illinois: For this one, we blame the children. Yeah, kids voted this one sd the symbol, choosing it over the bluebird, meadowlark, bobwhite, and oriole, according to the Illinois Department of Natural Resources. So, yeah, probably because it's familiar and red.

Indiana: For...reasons. Yeah, even less is known about this choice. Safe to assume, though, that it's because it's familiar and red.

Ohio: Apparently, this is because it's red and has a cheerful song. 'Kay. Again, not a lot of evidence for this one, but we'll go with it.

North Carolina: This one also came down to public vote, after a campaign initiated by the North Carolina Bird Club in 1943. It won over the red-winged blackbird, wild turkey, scarlet tanager, and gray catbird. Apparently, this was the second attempt at a state bird, as the Carolina Chickadee (Poecile carolinensis) had been chosen ten years earlier, but only retained the position for a week because the bird's other name is, and this is true, the tomtit. And that was apparently too lewd for the title of state bird. Jesus. We'll get back to that when I address North Carolina officially.

West Virginia: Again, chosen and voted by schoolchildren, and chosen because it's familiar, red, and has a cheerful song. 'Kay.

Virginia: No idea. Also, don't listen to the sites that say their bird "exemplifies the quality of the state" unless they have the GODDAMN PAPERWORK to back that shit up. If I had to guess, it's possibly because the northern cardinal is one of the first birds seen in the state by settlers to the continental USA, who landed in...Virginia. So, the state's got a historical connection to the cardinal, meaning that the last state to ratify it as a state bird is the one to make the most sense to do so.

So, yeah...only one of those makes sense to me. Otherwise, it just feels...random. And by the way, many of the state birds do make some sense. Utah's choice, the California Gull (Larus californicus), has roots in a Mormon miracle, which makes perfect sense for the Mormon state. Louisiana's Brown Pelican (Pelecanus occidentalis) is an iconic species to the American southeast, and a massive proportion of the species breeds in the state. Same goes for the Scissor-tailed Flycatcher (Tyrannus forficatus), the state bird of Oklahoma. Iconic and unique grassland bird, and it breeds within the state in high quantities for the global population.

But others? Why does New York (a state I grew up in and around) have the Eastern Bluebird (Sialia sialis) for its state bird? Because it's blue and nice-looking? Why exactly do Wyoming, Oregon, Nebraska, Kansas, Montana, and North Dakota ALL have the Western Meadowlark (Sturnella neglecta)? I love the song too, and it's an iconic grassland species, but really? All of you? And Maine? Maine...Maine. I mean, you didn't even go for a specific species and just listed "chickadee" as your state bird. Why? There is a MUCH. BETTER. OPTION. OBVIOUSLY. But...I digress.

...FUCK IT

WHY ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH IS MAINE'S STATE BIRD NOT THE ATLANTIC PUFFIN (Fratercula arctica)??? ANSWER ME MAINE GODDAMMIT

Seriously, what the hell? It's the only state IN THE UNION where the Atlantic puffin breeds, and it's an incredibly iconic bird! I mean, look at that thing! They're adorable, fish-eating, clumsy-flying, feathery orbs with a Froot Loops beak (for part of the year), complete with their own fucking cereal that I ate constantly as a child. And their babies are called pufflings! PUFFLINGS!!! DO YOU HEAR ME MAINE WHAT THE FU

...OK. OK. I'm good. Look, this genuinely irritates the SHIT out of me, both as a hobbyist and as a professional. There are near 1,000 bird species that can be found in the United States, and the state birds are, honestly, some basic-ass choices that doesn't BEGIN to explore the incredible diversity of this taxon. And honestly, maybe if we changed up the state birds, we could increase awareness for these animals and their conservation stories and needs. There are so many missed opportunities here for us as educators, birders, ornithologists, backyard birdwatchers, and even Birdblr, to educate those around us who aren't as ornithologically-inclined. Imagine being able to convince a friend to go find the state bird on a trip some weekend. It could be a fun activity, and a fun way to get into birdwatching and the natural world! IT'S GOT POTENTIAL!!!

And look, I realize I'm not alone on this front. Various people have proposed changing up the state birds, including some more powerful professionals than I. If you haven't seen it yet, check out this essay series from the Cornell Lab of Ornithology that came out last year, which asks whether or not eBird could be used to identify better candidates for state birds. And I'll be using it for what's coming next. Because here's the thing. I'm tired of ranting alone in the dark towards nobody while my fiancee is trying to sleep about this. I need to rant to you poor people instead. And what's more...I want people to rant with me. If they want to. So...

TO ME, BIRDBLR!!! LEND ME YOUR BINOCULARS!!!

I propose an initiative to create a new list of state birds for the United States of America. And I'm talkin' EVERY state, baby! Even the ones that have fitting birds, as mentioned above. We live in a GODDAMN DEMOCRACY, and I say that we put this to a vote. So, Imma make a series of polls, one for each state. And yeah, that's 50 polls. Each will have a selection of birds, including the current state bird for that state, and I'll present the options in each case. The rules and selection criteria for the birds I'll present are as follows:

The bird has to be wild and breed in the state in question. No migrants, to accidentals, no introduced species (looking at you, South Dakota), no domestic species (looking at you, Rhode Island and Delaware). They're from the state, they breed there, and they're wild. Don't have to be endemic to the state, but they need to be found there, at bare goddamn minimum.

No repeats! Every state will have a different species! No more repeats. If there are any ties for states to get a given bird, another set of polls will be made at the end to determine which state will get that bird, and the second highest bird will claim the spot for that state. I'll try to avoid that for each state, but we'll see how things go.

There has to be a reason for their selection. For each of the birds presented for each state, I'll make a solid argument for their nomination. This also goes for any birds submitted to me for suggestions (and yes, I mean to say y'all can make suggestions if you want to for each state). If you have a bird you think would be good for a state, especially if it's your state, please give me a reason. Not that it's pretty, not that you like it's song, not that it "represents the spirit of the state's people" for no easily defined reason. GIVE ME A REASON

And for now, that's it! And hell, if this gets popular or demanded (and I'm saying this if, like, 30 people pay attention to this post), I'll also do the District of Columbia and the U.S. territories. And hell (again), I'll even consider doing other countries if that gets demanded, definitely starting with Canada and seeing how things go from there. And finally...if people want it, maybe even the Bald Eagle (Halieetus leucocephalus) will go up for debate as the USA's national bird. Although, not gonna lie, I think that we're stuck with that one. Still, there are other questions that can be brought up if this gets popular enough. For now, though, let's focus on one thing at a time.

So, hopefully you answered the poll at the top, because I am curious as to what you think about your state bird. And just to set this up, the first state on the chopping block is Delaware, which has one of the most offensive state birds, in my opinion. Because seriously. What the fuck, Delaware? What the fuck.

See you soon, hopefully! And happy birding!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Introduction to the State Birds Initiative

Delaware - Poll | Results Pennsylvania - Poll | Results New Jersey - Poll | Results (coming soon) Georgia - incoming!

[randomyuu]

the way it follows you home, the stories i never told

My guy Vox once again graced us with lovely Goyuu fanfics, and the way it follows you home, the stories i never told, made me go FERAL.

Time travel? Two Gojou Satorus? Double affection for our sunshine Yuuji? Yuuji sandwich? What feels like possible continuation of (you'll whisper, serpent tongue) what you fear you have become???

FUCK.

I need to stop indulging my imagination too much. I should’ve been content with writing long-ass comments but noooooo, my brain goes “you gotta draw it”. DAMMIT VOX, YOU AND YOUR DELICIOUS WRITINGS HHHHHH

So… usually I should’ve picked a favourite scene that is within my drawing capability, but I just… love all three chapters??? So I made a questionable time investment? I can’t stop??? Help???

This is probably the most ambitious fanart project I’ve ever done so far. Fair enough, considering I might combust if I keep these welled-up emotions inside from reading Vox’s Goyuu fics. Fuck.

Fic info:

Title: the way it follows you home, the stories i never told

Author: @voxofthevoid

Pairing: YuuGoGo. Future!Yuuji, Future!Gojou, Teen!Gojou

(idk why I laugh writing YuuGoGo. I’m beyond help)

Currently, it is 3 chapters out of 8. And it’s gonna be NSFW chapter 4 onwards, so don’t forget to read the tags first, folks!

The drawings are under Read More, because I have lots of thoughts surrounding each chapter and drawings. It’ll be hella long if I didn’t hide it here. It was a mess down there. A combination of hours before, during, and after I read said fic. I’d say good luck finding the art among the sea of jumbled words but… you’ll find them easily. Don’t worry about it haha

SPOILERS FOR ALL 3 CHAPTERS! I highly recommend reading those first before diving into these drawings!

Also for the comics, read from right to left please!

From here on, I will be referring to the Future!Gojou as Gojou and the teenage one as Satoru.

Overall, drawing all these is fun! Really fun! This project pushed me quite hard, forcing me to test my limit (because I rarely draw this much back to back). Since this is a combination of drawings and comics, the coloring style will not be consistent. In a way, I want to try some brushes I never get to use, as well as try out my new graphic tablet. Drawing these got me giggling because I was finally able to let loose during line art. It's much easier to do so, and sometimes I just get to reread the fic and giggle to myself for the nth time.

CHAPTER 1:

Whooo. Whooooooooo—

Ok, ok, the premise is just that good. It intrigued me, fascinated me, and I just… oomph. I cannot refuse a Time Travel Yuuji Sandwich. Sign me up.

Honestly, there are two scenes that are just… a bit too clear in my mind when reading this chapter. That would be the one I drew above, and the other is when Yaga called Gojou to come outside of the class. I love, loooove how Vox wrote Satoru’s POV. And when Yuuji fucking giggles?

I lost it.

Can you imagine, drawing Yuuji grins, with shiny stuff, maybe some sunlight, just purely happy and indulging Gojou?

Help me, for I am drowning in my love and adoration for Yuuji.

Page 2 is an experiment on using harsh black as shading (kind of?). I really enjoyed colouring Yuuji, and drawing those buffalo skulls! I wish I can grasp the concept of contrast a bit better tho :v

CHAPTER 2:

This is probably the only chapter where I picture still images instead of comic panels. A bit like those cool chapter covers in mangas. The one I really, really want to draw is the scene with Satoru on the table. Can’t pass the opportunity to highlight Satoru being a brat, albeit a really cool brat.

Cool idea drawing always proves to be a challenge, because of course my artistic skill just so happens to be below the requirement. Thank you, Sketchfab, for the chair and desk’s perspective otherwise I’m screwed lmao

The second scene that I want to draw the most is this:

Gojou is one step away from climbing Yuuji. Also, I have a bit of a problem picturing a man pouting that makes him look crazy instead, so please have Gojou pouting adorably instead. Because, as Yuuji said (with love), Gojou is (also) a brat.

This is possibly my favorite art in this project, after Yuuji's in Chapter 1 page 2. It's clean because I don't have to draw background, and I was having a fun time drawing Yuuji. And Gojou's squishy cheek as well.

Oh, actually, there is a “manga” scene in this chapter. It’s when Yuuji said, “I love Satoru.”

I just—

AAAAAHHHHH YUUJIIIIIII YOU AND VOX ARE GONNA BE THE DEATH OF ME. That secure relationship between Yuuji and Gojou? Satoru’s description of how Yuuji’s smile could blot out the sun??? Not me screaming 💀 I also see bits of hints of possible co-dependency, though I could be reading those wrong, but either way I’m good. Secure and possessive relationships are fun to consume hhhhhh

But yeah. There are too many wholesome Yuuji smiles in this fic, and I… I am not confident enough to draw genuine happiness. It’s too much for me ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

For this chapter, another reason why I chose these two scenes is just because I want to try and draw cover-worthy pictures of Yuuji and Satoru, and Yuuji and Gojou (cough)

CHAPTER 3:

We start the chapter with Nanamin. Ah, Nanamin. I forgot what his teen self looked like and was surprised to see his design again lmao

I want to draw Yuuji and Nanami scene because… I just want to, I guess. I have never drawn him before (Yaga as well) so that's an interesting challenge. I got two ideas on how I want to draw it. One is a bit painting-esque, and the other one is like another chapter cover. In the end, I chose the cover one because I want to emphasise the difference between teen!Nanami and the Nanami from Yuuji’s original timeline, and how the watch feels like a connection between the same (yet not) person. It’s a bittersweet feeling? In a way?

I’m not really good at explaining my intention ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

I love Yuuji’s answer to Nanami's question.

AND FINALLY.

A Yuuji SandwichTM scene.

And oh B O I do I love it. Have I told you I like every chapter? I probably have. But this one? Satoru’s curiosity, Yuuji’s on-brand self-deprecation, and Gojou come strolling down to show more of Yuuji to his mini-self. I want to draw this whole scene, from Gojou finding them, feeding Yuuji snacks, bitch-slapping Satoru into the backroom, to Yuuji growling. Them trying to hide a boner from Yuuji’s growl got me cackling so hard I LOVE IT 😭

I love it all. Please love Yuuji in my stead, Satoru and Satonyan :3

Oh! Also! 40-finger Yuuji sounds really, really cool! I’ll be happy with whatever Vox will give us in future chapters, but 40-finger Yuuji… possible scene with this timeline’s Sukuna… my god. The action! The drama! The bloodshed! One can only hope.

However, as much as I love that whole scene, it’s still too much for me :”) I’m still not yet confident in delivering the humour and action. Also my already-long drawing plan had my brain groaning in protest so I can’t push my luck :'D

When Gojou said "He looks sweet, but he's a bit of a beast", I kept picturing Yuuji staring innocently, but there was an edge to his look. As if the moment Satoru looks away, he will pounce. But in the end I just stick with innocent-looking Yuuji because I accidentally drew his eyes that way and I want to keep it in lol

Since Satoru points out how soft and cuddly Yuuji is, I also want to draw soft Yuuji :v

And the last one… is the last scene. For some reason, I read that both Gojou and Satoru share Yuuji’s lap and was having a frustrating yet fun time figuring out how it’s… physically possible, without having their butts on the ground because they both are not small at all. As I lined the art, I reread it again and… perhaps I read it wrong? Satoru is beside Yuuji, and not on his lap? So yeah, this one might be the least accurate, but hey, at least you can view it as a crack drawing or something :v

AAAANNNDDD I HAVE EXCEEDED TODAY’S BRAIN CAPACITY OF FORMING WORDS

Have I told you I love this fic?

…I probably have.

Have an amazing week (❁´▽`❁)*✲ﾟ*

[ursiday]

may i ask how you've gotten to the level of skill you're at with your art when you're studying another field? like obviously you studied lots but how did you go about finding out what and how to study to hone your anatomy, painting, animation etc. skills?

If you crack this please let me know because I'm struggling lol. Honestly when it comes to studying art I'm not the person to ask, my technical skill is quite far behind where I would like it to be, I've never really studied art in a dedicated way and moreso backed into learning things just by doing stuff I feel like working on. Most of my drawings fall pretty squarely in my comfort zone and I don't do a lot of time-consuming projects, like it's probably obvious I haven't done much animating since starting grad school lol

The reality though is that I choose to spend time on art at the expense of a lot of other things (including my school/research/teaching work... I am not a disciplined student). I can't say I recommend that approach necessarily buuut I think the best advice I can give is to think about what's important to you and what you personally want to get out of making art, if you want to enjoy it as a hobby then I think you should do whatever whenever you want that feels fun. That's what I've been doing, but it's starting to wear on me a lot because I do want to build a stronger body of work and work on more ambitious projects. If you do have a specific goal in mind then whatever that is will direct the kind of things you'll want to work on and practice. But be kind to yourself because that's a difficult thing to do even without having to split your time and energy

[mongrel-mage]

A Spoiler-free review of Edge of Sleep

Fucking incredible. Like...9/10 and the only reason I say so is because there were only 6 20-ish minute episodes and I wanted the show to be longer and give us more backstory on the characters and such. It'll be a bit longer of a post, but rest assured that there are no spoilers under the link.

Main differences from the podcast, but still minor: the character of The Trespasser does not feature in the show, nor do Dave's story about the Moobles and the ensuing hallucinations he describes. However, I was satisfied with how they used the information from The Trespasser's subplot in the actual TV show, and there was a little reference to him at the beginning of Episode 5 that made me smile, so I'm really not that fussed about those things being missing.

I'm going to take a minute to rave about Eve Harlow, who plays Linda. What a goddamn POWERHOUSE of an actress, honestly. Perfect casting. She nailed a character who is tough as iron, focused, determined, and intelligent without making Linda come across as unnecessarily cold or unlikeable--I'll go so far to say that Linda was my favorite character (by a slim margin, but still there). Eve Harlow has an incredibly expressive face and eyes that convey complex emotions without relying on the same few expressions or overacting what she's feeling. I really want to see her get some sort of awards or accolades for her performance because she carried damn near all of her scenes.

Let's talk about Mark. I already knew that he could act well because I'd watched his other projects, but most/if not all of them have at least some level of comedy, humor, or character who lightens the mental load at least a little bit. We all know that he's a giggly bitch and likes to have fun, and there's nothing wrong with that. That said, I'm comfortable saying that Edge of Sleep is easily his most ambitiously dramatic project--there was a lot of raw stress, grief, anger, and pain that Dave Torres went through, and I was impressed at how well Mark portrayed it. It's obvious how much he tries and how hard he cares; it's so clear that this wasn't some celebrity vanity project. You can really feel the love and the energy and the care that he put into this, and I was, like I said, impressed at his range as a drama/horror actor. There were some moments and expressions he had in the show (namely in the first episode, when the people at the party are giving Dave a hard time about his sleep disorder and past episodes) that hit me unexpectedly hard. Amazing performance, Mark. I'm proud of you.

I also want to take another moment to rave about the makeup and hair department. Standing ovation. The gradual increase of the characters' exhaustion and general levels of dishevelment (the thing that stuck with me the most was Linda's makeup and hair, SO good) looked very real and read well on camera. Anyone who knows me irl knows what a freak I am for good practical effects/makeup, and I want to make sure that those artists are acknowledged and appreciated. I'm also going to throw in some kudos for whoever was behind the Elephant Monster--that thing was FUCKED UP (/pos). I love a Creature and it was sufficiently more disturbing than I had expected it to be, since The Elephant isn't given much of a description in the podcast. I'm not sure if it was practical effects or something computer generated, but whatever it was it was amazing. Hats off to the Creature Crew!

Lastly: I WANT SEASON TWO. GIVE IT TO ME. I WANT TO RIP IT APART WITH MY TEETH. I HAVE BEEN GOOD AND COHERENT FOR THIS LONG NOW GIVE ME MORE.

Also. I promised no spoilers and there shall be none. But that last shot of the last episode? fucking HAUNTING. Here's hoping that us catapulting Edge of Sleep to the TOP FIVE, BEFORE THE OFFICIAL LAUNCH, will seriously throw some weight to whoever can decide to give us a second season.

[citrinae]

avoid the crowds.

law x reader

summary; you're an aspiring biologist, hard-working on your phd. when you're coupled with your colleague law to enrich your research, you're mortified to discover that other's personal projects may be a little more ambitious than you’d anticipate. 

contents; gravedigging, only a pinch of gore, explicit at times, toxic attachments, love/hate, smoking, references to mary shelley because i’m a nerd & law is pathetic, college/academia!AU, gn!reader, wc: 2k. this is actually my very first time writing for this freak, intensely praying that i did him justice. check here for more spooktober shenanigans.

masterlist

Dirt on your shoes, on your jeans, under your nails. Pushing a lit cigarette between your lips, you realise your hands are slightly trembling. It’s slowly that you take the smoke in, a burning sensation into your lungs making you forget about the cold creeping up your cheeks, your ankles and into your bones, and you keep it there for a moment. Your eyes wander to the number of gravestones carrying the memory of someone’s friend, partner, or sibling, all cared for and regretfully gone. There’s a rustle coming from your right, boot sliding on the ground before his knee bumps into yours. With his hat he brushes the dirt off his lap. 

“This shit is bad for your health,” Law says, with a hint of superiority that has you pursing your lips around the cigarette. 

“These guys haven’t seen a pub in decades,” you manage to keep your cool. “Thought they wouldn’t mind if I brought them a piece of memory.”

He doesn’t play along. “They are dead. I doubt they care about much of anything.”

“How do you expect your students to like you if you can’t even take a joke?” you say through an exhale. 

“Honestly?” Law props his weight on the shovel he’s dug into the ground, legs spread. “The very few students I’ve had so far were actually funny.”

“Fuck you,” you huff. “Honestly.”

“Kindly reminding you that we’re in a cemetery,” he drones. “I'd restrain my libido for when we get back.”

You give him a look, still not believing he said that. His fingers—long, nimble, tattooed at the knuckles—rest atop his knees as he absently watches ahead. He’s slack in track pants and sweater, not that tonight makes him any different from the way you’ve always known him—cold, laid back. The sky is dark, only a few hours away from dawn. At your feet lingers a plastic bag he’s filled with everything needed for his fun little science project. 

Or rather, your fun little science project, now that you found out about it and agreed to let him do his magic before your eyes. The only condition was that you do it quietly—so far, you’re being terrible at it, and still he keeps you by like some sort of low-cost apprentice. Looking at the spots where dirt has been immaculately removed and battered back into place, your stomach threatens to turn. 

How have you ended up like this?

(There was someone in your research group; a guy called Trafalgar D. Water Law. A brilliant fellow, a committed academic. A little bit of an asshole, if you were to be completely honest. Law rarely ever spoke to the rest of you, let alone spend time with the group. Frequented the lab when you were about to call it a day and left early in the morning, just before you'd put on your whitecoats, fluorescent light droning overhead and steam hovering from coffee mugs. The nights were when he liked to work the most, doing whatever the fuck he was up to. Your PhD coordinator said something about reinventing surgery; but not even they were able to run into further detail. You were all too buried in your own projects to pry.

Water gathered at the tip of your nose and dripped onto your shoe. Your clothes were soaked and plastered to your skin; you hadn’t expected to rain that night. 

“Jesus fuck,” you managed under your breath. There was a dense, awful smell lingering in the air, the door to the research room locked with no spare key to use. “Law, are you in there?” 

Movement on the other side, pretending you didn’t exist. Your hair curled at your nape, wet and cold, and a feverish sensation began to climb up your temples. 

You tried again. “I left my journal in here, and, uhm,” scratching your head, “see I really needed to look up some notes tonight. May I come in and fetch it so I can leave you be?”

Still no answer; you were starting to get angry. 

You also needed a towel. 

“Listen up you freak,” through gritted teeth. “I don’t give two shits about what you’re doing or how many dicks you had to suck to be allowed to act like you own this fucking place. My day was bad enough to only care about my stupid little notes I left in that stupid little room, so please, for the love of god, open the door or else I’ll break a window or something and tab the damage on your weird ass name.”

“Who’s breaking what?” It was coming from behind; you turned, and stopped. Wiping his hands with a white washcloth, there stood Law, hoodie sleeves rolled to elbows, dark hair dishevelled, bags under his eyes. He looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks. 

The sounds you were hearing from inside the workroom didn’t cease. You felt heavy with the onset of a headache. 

“But if you’re here,” you said, incredulous. “Then who’s—” a second of thought. “What’s—”

Folding his arms, fabric thrown over his shoulder, “Yeah?”

The words felt weird leaving you, “What do you keep in there?”

“Nothing to be concerned about,” Law said, plainly. He seemed to know better than coming up with an excuse. There were steps that you heard, after all, nothing a branch against a window or a vending machine could replace. 

“You were saying you needed something?” he added, searching his pockets. “Let me get that for you, stay right there.”

But you didn’t stay put. You couldn’t. Shortly after watching him turn the key into the lock, careful not to reveal much of what awaited him inside, impulse had you setting your foot in the door. An elbow pressed on steel, a tattoo beat into floor tiles. And you could hardly hear the disturbed hiss leaving him now that you were facing a true miracle of modern medicine.)

They say the secrets of Heaven and Earth ought to stay in the palms of the one behind their making, for the man was made a crafty artist, but, alas, uncompleted. Understanding is a bottomless pit, only for the divine to fill and look after. But why are they to be frowned upon, half-made creatures, clinging to the knowledge that would make them whole?

(A strange friendship took shape that night. You agreed to keep the secret and Law allowed you to keep him company during the nights, borrowing notes, studying equipment. Little of this brought anything new to your own research, and yet, being in Law’s presence felt like a giant leap in your career. You wouldn’t be made to admit it, but you admired him, and at the same time he seemed almost content with the ease at which you were navigating the dense volume of research. As far as work was concerned, you were making a surprisingly good team—that you could both agree on despite your infuriating personalities. 

Some uneventful nights you would fiddle with his earrings as he measured the diameter of a human limb. Some other nights, his hand would flatten across your back as he showed you how man-made particles quivered and dispersed under the microscope. Your eyes ached from lack of sleep but your curiosity was a persistent fiend, always hungry for more, begging to be kept entertained. Slowly you found yourself disconnected from everything happening around you other than your undergraduate classes and lab work. Everything in your world revolved around science, and consequently, around Law. 

But spending so much time around each other would soon get the best—or worst—of you both, on a night just as rainy as the one you started working together. There was an hour left until the sky would start bleeding into a deep gradient of blues, two before the building would be animated with swarms of steps and voices. Tables had been diligently swept with no trace of your nightly work, equipment dismantled and notebooks locked away—just like Law instructed you to. Your steps echoed down the hallways of the facility, dark and empty, comfortable silence lingering between your forms as you were heading out. Exhaustion crept into your body to the point walking felt like floating. To your left, Law’s breathing seemed heavier than usual. You found yourself cagily tracing the contours of his hair, his ear, his neck and shoulder, stopping at his hand that he kept buried into a pocket. 

A beat later, too soon to tell how it happened, you were pressed against a wall, Law’s stare taking from confused to determined as he tried to keep up with his own actions. 

There was a pause. 

“You don’t have the guts,” you provoked, adrenaline pushing your mouth into a smirk. 

Law clicked his tongue. Then he kissed you, deeply, viciously, and you returned it without much thought. White hat collapsed on the floor as your fingers struggled to make their way through his hair, digging themselves into his scalp, touching and searing everything they found in their reach. Standing so close to him you were surprised to catch a faint trace of cologne lingering under all the metal and soap and formalin he worked with. Your head spun. His hand was cold as it touched you under your sweater; with his other he had to cover your mouth to keep a sound from coming out.

It didn’t stop you. He urged you somewhere more secluded.)

You flick the ashes off your cigarette. “Hey,” you say, trying to figure out the inscription chiselled on a gravestone. “Is it fair? To disturb these people’s peace like that?”

Law breathes out, heavily, a little shaken himself. He thinks about it for a moment. Then, massaging a temple, he says, “I think it’s a little too late to ask yourself this.” He’s right. 

“Maybe.” It’s faint, distracted. 

Some would say you’re giving them a second chance; you know that’s not the case here. None of you wants nothing out of this but the Promethean high of discovery. Performing miracles with a scalpel and needle, building an universe of your own. 

Wind blows in your direction, sharp like a slap in the face, and your body starts coiling within itself as it does. 

(Your research sessions carried on like this. Passing thread through layers of dead skin, sinking your teeth into Law’s skin moments later. Papers and pens and scissors scattered on the floor. Bodies feverish and drenched in sweat. Taking his chin between thumb and forefinger, you relished the faces he made after claiming that you inspire him. With his cock deep inside you, Law admitted he was glad to have found a use for that foul mouth of yours. When you use it to say his name, he added on, his voice grave and possessive, beard tickling your earshell, it makes him believe your voice was sewed for him.)

“Time to go,” Law says, already back on his feet.  

You insist that he carries the bag. And so he does, hoisting it around his shoulder without much care for its contents. You stub out your cigarette under your foot, and your eyes roll heavenwards when he demands that you pick the thing up. 

“I was meaning to,” you sneer, bending down. “Who do you take me for?”

“Do you really want me to answer that?” Law hands you the shovel. 

“For the record,” dusting off your jeans, “When faculty reviews are up, I’m ruining your ass.”

Law’s smirk is offensive. “Double-check your spelling before sending anything in.”

No one says a word on the way back to the facility. With weight propped on your shoulders and stars hiding one by one behind the horizon, the moment feels almost serene, and you dismiss the impulse to close your eyes because you know you will be falling asleep as soon as you do. For now, you end up settling with this space between dream and reality, hoping that maybe, somewhere, awaits the truth you’ve been working so hard to earn. 

[correlatedcontents]

the uncle who works for nintendo: ten years on

10 years ago today i released a game called THE UNCLE WHO WORKS FOR NINTENDO. with art by Kim Parker, multiple endings, a metafictional structure, and extensive sound design, it was (and remains) my most ambitious completed solo dev project. initially conceived as the gamergate harassment movement sprawled over social media, and coinciding with the attacks on residents of ferguson, mo following the police killing of michael brown, it's often seemed in retrospect that this was a moment where the loathsome present really crystallized

for my part, the response to the game was beyond all expectation; kotaku linked it and totally obliterated my webhosting, incurring a huge overage charge. i was a poor grad student and people helped crowdfund the cost. that was amazing, but the whole thing kind of scared me, honestly!

that's mainly why my projects from this point scaled back, then ended as i turned my mind toward finishing grad school: i didn't have the time or resources to technically expand in the ways that i wanted, and furthermore i was leery of becoming a guy who was expected to make Statements.

the intervening years have been… well, they've been something. you were there, presumably. one of the people namechecked in the game's author notes, a target of harassment at the time, is now a noted unprincipled political hack, and i'm not talking about zizek. but remember quoting zizek?

the world turns. i recorded my first podcast because of this game. it got onto people's best of the year lists. paste called it "the indie game of the year." it won the xyzzy award for best npc.

and none of the stuff that distressed me so much that i made the game went anywhere.

there was a lot of talk in the early 2010s about the power of games to change people and make them better. and i think that's probably true--all encounters with art can change you, for better and worse--but i've long been skeptical of strong and positive claims for art's "efficacy."

i didn't think my game was going to solve any problems, but it was at least going to index them. and i think it indexed gamergate, though it did nothing to stop that ravening, juvenile nostalgia mindset from wholly subsuming the gamer cultural sphere, to say nothing of spheres beyond it

Liz Ryerson, another influence on UWWFN, recently wrote a long essay about just this.

but one thing the game's reception did show me is that there are in fact people who want to think, ant to interrogate the easy bindings between experience and unreflective thought, and find ways of thinking and feeling contrary to the ever-rising tide of culture's venom. the world is not settled.

the game cemented my friendship with Cameron Kunzelman, and the podcasting work we've since done for Ranged Touch has been (to my mind) more useful in this regard than any game i could make, modeling engagement with the weirdness of both art and the world critically and thoughtfully. and gaming is not kaput! i was fortunate to make connections within the twitter dev scene, and currently work at Half Mermaid on a project that will not make you a better person, but might offer ways for thinking about life in a turbulent world where our ugliness is sold back to us at a premium.

10 years is somehow both a short time and, it turns out, an incredibly long time. a lot happens, and it's never enough, and it's also way too much. and sometimes a decade on, even when you're a guy who doesn't want to make Statements you still feel like there's something worth remarking upon. thanks

[inner-viper]

An Overview of your FS/Lover Soulmate. Who is your soulmate? What are they like? How will you meet them or what is in their current alignment? (18+ ONLY)

Hello everyone, I am Viper, a seer/oracle reader. I am well-versed in my divination and intuition. I decided to do this love tarot reading for fun. I love doing love readings because they are delightful. I hope you find enjoyment in it as I do. Remember nothing is set in stone, you are free to make any choice in your life. For entertainment purposes ONLY. NO MINORS. 18+ ONLY. TW: Mentions of SEXUAL CONTENT. If you are not into that then please leave.

Choose an image that resonates with you. The image that you catches your attention the most is most likely your pile. You can choose 2 or more piles if it resonates. Only take what you deeply resonate with and leave the rest for another. Remember this is general, not every detail will match up.

CHECK OUT MY SHOP AT: https://innerviper.etsy.com

PILE 1:

Classical Tarot Deck: Nine of Swords, Three of Cups, Eight of Wands, The Sun (in reverse), Eight of Pentacles, Nine of Pentacles

Oracle Cards: Appreciation, Contract, The Garden and The Gate, Woman holding a heart (in reverse), All Tied Up, Patience

Ok, this person is a hard worker. They are extremely ambitious and a go-getter-type person. I am also seeing that they are very soft looking. They present themselves with grace and they take amazing care of themselves when they aren’t working too much. Their features are very soft and round. You can tell that this person is very kind. They are also well-liked by their peers. They honestly might be very popular. (Like everyone likes them/knows them but no one really knows them. Although, this is very general you can apply this to everyone). They definitely give off Pisces energy or Gemini energy/FIRE ENERGY TOO. They could have strong earth placements as well. I see that this person is independent, they don’t rely on anyone because they are always achieving their own goals for themselves. They don’t care about other people's goals but they do care about their reputation. I’m seeing that this person has new creative projects or ideas that they value. They definitely have a lot of patience and balanced. Wow, this person is extremely balanced. Honestly, this person is reliable as fuck. If you are ever stranded in the desert, they would drop everything they are doing to come and help you. That’s the type of person they are. They do not wear their heart on their sleeves so they honestly hide their true emotions from others. They seem to have a fear of being vulnerable and a fear of things not going their way. I see how they can get caught up in taking too much workload. They are learning to balance though. The universe is definitely giving lessons to this person about balancing and being honest with themselves right now. They also have strong morals and or philosophy, they could be a lawyer or in the business/fine print side of the business. For some people, they might work in gardening or landscaping. I also see that they present themselves as very beautiful and they are not the type of person to show up in pajamas to go to the store. They are very rich/abundant. They love it when people appreciate them and they appreciate others as well. They probably didn’t have many words of affirmation and when others praise them they get happy. They love nature when they are stressed they stroll through gardens or forests to clear their mind. They would love to go with you to take a walk. Some people might get invited to some nature location and this might be them. They are very warm towards you for sure. This person will be madly in love with you, they will try to play it cool though. As in, they want you to see how independent they are and might be flashy with their material items. They definitely will flex so you can choose them over others. They definitely will respect whoever you choose but they will get secretly jealous but I think they think no one can tell but everyone can LMFAO. This person is mature and very wise beyond their years so they aren’t irrational, of course, everyone has their bad moments in life. If you are in your 20s, I feel like this person will be around your age as well. For some people they might be in their 40s. For those older, they might be in their 30/40s divorced. They also might have one daughter/son.

For their appearance: White person/Hispanic tan person/dark brown eyes/brown hair (could be light or dark), for a feminine presenting person could have highlights and she has long beautiful hair, (she’s fine asf), beautiful smile (it’s contagious), beautiful hands but they are strong

SONG: Lana Del Rey- Playing Dangerously (the lyrics 100% match this energy of theirs)

PILE 2:

Classical Tarot Deck: The Lovers, Two of Swords, Six of Pentacles, King of Cups, Ace of Wands (in reverse), Knight of Swords (in reverse), Four of Pentacles (in reverse) extra card that went flying LMAO

Oracle Cards: The Garden and The Gate, All Tied Up (in reverse), Blossoming Abundance (in reverse), Attachment, Woman Holding a Heart, The Thinking Woman

Your Fs is probably a player/hoe. They like to sleep around with others because it brings them deep satisfaction with their HIGH sex drive. Honestly, not many people can keep up with their sex drive so.. They aren’t pushy either, they honestly attract a lot of people from their looks or aura. They are extremely attractive. This person walks into the room and everyone turns their head. If this person isn’t attractive to you, then they definitely have a strong magnetic aura that draws people’s sexual energy in. They have been in a couple of serious relationships. Once they see you, for some, you already know them (👀🫣) they will suddenly act strange. They will feel weird for wanting to commit to someone (commitment issues LOL). This person has strong qualities as well, they don’t let their emotions get the best of them and that’s very admirable. If someone is actively provoking them they will 100% ignore them and walk away. They are not afraid of walking away from others that don’t interest them. They also like you because you are intellectually challenging, you are able to talk to them about anything and everything. I see that they definitely have or will grow from their last flirtatious events. As they will learn to eventually move towards serious commitment. The majority of people have not met them. That’s why the universe is not putting you both together yet. I also see that they are very tall, or taller than you. This person likes to take you out on multiple fun dates, they need a friend before a lover. This is friends to lovers or friends with benefits to lovers. They are very honest about their emotions and feelings. They will communicate how they feel and they will tell you directly if they like you. They spend a lot of time worrying about meaningless things. I also see for some people that they might be attached to someone or something. They will eventually have to learn to let it go. Remember humans have free will and this is ultimately them not you. I also see that they are very free-spirited, like to spend on others, and are definitely a giver/provider. They like to be given gifts randomly as well. I also see that they love going out to parties and having a good time. They definitely party a lot if they are in college. They might have a hard time trying to balance school workload and partying. This person is very direct but something about them is that they won’t reveal much to you at first. I’m getting something from the cards that something is hidden from me, so maybe at first, they hide away from you. They stare at you and they think you don’t notice it. They have NICE lips. This person is very kissable. This person is open about their sexuality, they don’t give a fuck about the taboos surrounding sex. They believe it’s natural to want to have sex or make love. I’m also seeing that they are very romantic and passionate. If you are in your 20’s or early 30s this person is the same age as you, maybe being 1-2 years older. I really feel like most people will meet them through friends/college. For older people, this person is not what they appear to be. They look younger but they are actually older than they appear. There is no competition with them, they will make it known that you are seeing them. They honestly are possessive because they think you and them are meant for each other. They will respect your boundaries so if you don’t like something then call them out. They are definitely funny at times LOL. VENUS IN AIRES/VENUS IN GEMINI. Scorpio is strong in their chart.

For their appearance: Tan skin/darker skin color. Dyed hair or dark black hair. Their hair changes often? If they are very feminine presenting, they have long hair. Very well kept. Beard that suits their face. They got a nice body though, nice pp or vagina (LIKE ITS VERY PRETTY) Luscious lips for sure.

SONG: Boys a Liar Pt. 2 - Pink Pantheress (Yeah, this is 100% the situation i’m gathering)

PILE 3:

Classical Tarot Deck: Five of Pentacles (in reverse), Nine of Pentacles, The Hanged Man, Ace of Swords (in reverse), Eight of Wands (in reverse), The Lovers

Oracle Deck: Blossoming Abundance, The Thinking Man, Financial Constraints, Seventh Chakra/Archangel Uriel, Angel of Balance (in reverse), Walking Away

This person is very calm when it comes to their finances, they are very smart too. They are connected with the divine and are most likely very spiritual. They aren’t a witch/magician but they do believe in the divine. This person is wise in multiple aspects of their lives. Their life might have been one of teaching wisdom and patience, good thing comes to those who wait. I’m also seeing that they are very serious about lovers and relationships. They will be very glad to have met you because they will go through a whole new journey with you! This person is very kind but you don’t want to cross their boundaries because their words are like sharp knives. This person is very attentive towards their friends. They won’t give them the whole world but rather push them to be the best they can be. They also like to focus on gaining material success. They are very materialistic, to be honest. They have so much abundance and wealth that they are trying to constantly grow. An empire that lasts for decades. I honestly see that they don’t give a single fuck about others opinions. I mentioned this before but be careful to not say something malicious to them. This person spends their time thinking. They are always in their thoughts, you will be in their thoughts LOL. They definitely are straightforward. They may lack a balance between work and their personal life. They lack knowing how to balance other areas as well. They like to initiate projects and ideas. They are very worried about money, to be honest. It’s like they are constantly worrying if they have enough. They are very humble and well-respected in their careers. I feel like you guys will match well with each other. You’ll both push towards the best. They will be very sweet to you guys in private. HONESTLY, IM GETTING BUTTERFLIES. They know how to talk 100%. This person is a charmer LORD-. Watch out because they will catch you off guard. They have strong mercury in their chart. I also see that they love being in silence. If you already met them, (which I feel like you all haven’t :<) they will like to just feel your presence. They appear to be striking. Like honestly they aren’t too approachable but you can definitely come up toward them? This is very poorly described but they are intimidating. They are probably thinking about what they are going to eat for lunch and people will think they are thinking about the next new technology. I also see that they are probably in engineering, COULD BE Mechanical engineering (look it up if you don’t know what it is), or something of engineering. They also dress casually ok! They know what to appear as in certain occasions/events but they like being comfortable more. They give very honest advice, but also might come off as cruel? They are like you ask for it LOL. ALSO, SARCASM IS BIG HERE. They definitely are sarcastic.

For their appearance: Brown hair, Colored eyes, (Skin tone is varied here! Very diverse for this pile) They got a nice body if not on the thinner side. Very nice lips for this pile as well.. For a feminine presenting, they like to have long beautiful hair. (I think all piles had long hair?!) They like to wear gold!!

SONG: Cry- Cigarettes After Sex (This person is SO FUCKING SWEET TO YOU KSNFKFD)

[mtkay13]

Affection running deep

(^ me pretending I title my illustrations) More info below! It's a bit personal and fandom related.

So WKX likes to bite. Let's be honest, from what I know, most priest "gong"'s do, so this is more a priest thing than a WKX thing--but if we look at TYK in a vacuum, we can still just say that it's a WKX thing (and, coincidentally, in Qi Ye, a Wuxi thing 🤭) It's pretty delightful, isn't it, to think that ZZS will permanently bear the scar of WKX's deep bite in his wrist... I'm going to use this piece as an opportunity to talk a bit about the permanent mark that TYK and QY have been carving into me for the past year and a half, then.

Funnily enough, although I started sketching and making a few illustrations here and there before, I consider that the infamous bite is my real "entry" in this fandom, when I made the animatic based on the scene in the audio drama. It's to this day my most viewed piece, and is sort of what made me... "known" as an artist in the fandom, I guess.

Although I've always devoted the most energy to personal projects, I'm no stranger to being a dedicated fan, even though this is my first real, "public" fandom experience. And honestly, personal and fandom projects combined, the animatic is the biggest, most ambitious work I had ever done so far for something not work-related. It was exhausting, and I almost succumbed to burnout after I finished it (just because, combined with work, it got too much). Ironically, it's the state I found myself in afterwards that made me enjoy rereading TYK in a way I never had before.

It's hard to say, whether I let TYK's fangs sink in my throat, or if I was the one to latch on and not let go ever since; but my life has certainly been changed by it.

I often forget about the bite scene; about the bite, in general. It's rarely ever one of the scenes that I think about spontaneously--and I rarely think about drawing the bite scar. Maybe because I've always thought it was a more typical scene? Maybe because on the surface I didn't resonate that much with it? And yet, as I'm going through really rough times right now, this new piece is what I chose to draw yesterday. A bit more than a year ago, when work felt like it was completely consuming me, this is the scene I chose to animate. I'm not sure there is a point in diving too deeply in this. Maybe, more than I would have assumed, I resonate with the desperation and hope that this scene carries. I'm glad I got here, in this fandom. It has had its very difficult moments, in many different ways, and I've discovered new sources of anxiety along the way--but at the same time, I've discovered many joys that I had never known before, and I think it's worth it. I'm grateful for those books to be in my life--grateful for Wen Kexing, for Zhou Zishu, and all the other characters, to be in my life. But of course, more than that, I'm incredibly grateful for the people I met, for the people who spend time with me, who cheer on me and let me cheer on them. Thanks everyone, for being there, and helping me form memories of better days that I can always look forward to.

I'm glad I'm here.

[sequs-art-box]

give me ALL your Anger headcanons,,

You sure you want that? Okay.....

• Has a high pain tolerance. The most you'd get with a punch to his stomach is a small grunt. Nothing more.

• Continuing the tolerance thing, he has extremely high spice tolerance as well. Maybe to the point of not having capsaicin sensors at all. That'd be so funny honestly..

• Cold Take: Anger is Gay and Ace.

• SLIGHTLY WARM Take: He's Biromantic and Ace.

• Physically strong. Even more than Embarrassment. He could have broken through his grip no problem. Do you SEE my vision.

• Completely immune to lava (this is kinda canon already but I don't care >:>)

• Emits heat, even when he's not super angry. The other emotions use him as their personal heater- similar to Baymax in that one scene- during the winter.

• Has woken up the other emotions due to a bad dream many times. Surprisingly enough, his fire extinguisher hasn't been used yet.

• Anger is Joy's second in command.

• One kind of pain he can't tolerate are migraines (totally not projecting)

• I've mentioned this before but I like to think Anger is really good at making the others feel better, whether if it's about themselves or about how they work (gestures to the scene where he comforts Joy)

• Used to sleep with a tank top on but took it off after finding out going shirtless was way more comfortable

• Likes generally hardcore sounding music, but he doesn't mind some relaxing genres too. He ain't afraid to admit that either. He can listen to whatever the fuck he wants.

• Didn't like tea until Fear made him try it (Fear didn't like coffee until Anger made him try it)

• Doesn't have good handwriting. It's not too bad but Joy, Fear, and Anxiety wished he slowed down and wrote a little better.

• Anger is actually a very organized emotion, at least with the stuff he cares about.

• Cheeks turn cherry red when he's flustered (think of it like an opposite reaction to his orange cheeks when he's angry)

• After the events of the first movie, Anger had to *really* learn to control himself. That work definitely paid off by the second movie.

• He's actually not that bad of a dancer, yall just don't give him enough time to practice.

• Tends to babysit Envy a LOT. Says he doesn't like it but he's 100% a father figure to her now. Sorry, no takebacksies.

• PEOPLE THINK THIS MF CANT RUN OR SOME SHIT but he keeps up with the others just fine in the second movie. Dude literally works out every day how can he NOT.

• MY Anger is a good singer, but OG Anger isn't. Sorry bud. I can't see (hear) it.

• He is textbook "act now think later"

• Unintentionally an early bird. Often the first to wake up cause he needs to get shit done.

• The console was made with very durable material, specifically to withstand Ange's outbursts.

• He may be the "youngest" of the original five, but he acts like the oldest.

• Anger's love languages are quality time and acts of service.

• He was the first one to be brought down to the Belief System.

• Despite having a high spice tolerance, he's more of a savory/sweet guy.

• I love to think that Anger is unintentionally charming.... Giving him a high rizz score here. Sorry not sorry.

• Extremely protective of the other emotions. Doesn't show this side often, but when it matters, he'd fight till he fades from existence for them.

• Tried to learn origami with Joy but he kept burning the paper.

• Likes Western dragons more than Eastern dragons, he finds all kinda super interesting though.

• Owns multiple ties with the same design (this can be said about the other emotions too)

• If I were to give him an instrument, he's totally rock an electric bass, or any low sounding instrument.

• Anger is a dog person.

• Looks SUPER good with blue and black clothing. He should wear it more often.

• When he can't show affection to someone, he just punches them (toph from atla core LOL)

• Some positive aspects of his character: Loyal, compassionate, ambitious, and confident.

● Stopped reading the Mind Reader newspapers because they lost their journalistic integrity.

• I will edit this with more headcanons in the future. Enjoy this for now :))

[darkkitty1208]

on fic writing and fandom: where am i going forward?

So. It's a bloody dull Friday and I'm writing this post--have been meaning to, for a while--because I can't stop thinking about it. It's just a few (a lot, actually) thoughts I've had in my mind the past few days that I've decided to spill into a single post, which turned out far longer than it needed to be, but nothing too important. Under the cut.

I've been a fanfic writer for a while now. Not a long time by any means, but a while nonetheless. My first fic--which is now orphaned like a few of its brothers for undisclosed reasons, though if you're an og you might be able to guess why--was dated back to the 18th of November 2021. 3 years later and I've got a humble 89 works and counting (the orphaned works and unposted wips unincluded). I can safely say I've improved quite a lot since then.

Where are you going with this, then, Kitty? Surely you aren't here just to brag about your writing progress?

Well. Not exactly. But I'll start with this: I guess what I'm trying to say is I've lost the spark.

You know. The old feeling. That boost of serotonin you get after you finish a piece you're proud of, or when you get lovely reviews on ao3, or when you get a kudos email, or a new mutual, or some wild tags under your silly post. The spark. I haven't felt it in a long time, now. The last time it's been so palpable was... I'm not sure. Probably last year's October. That was a lot of fun. I was most prolific in fic writing, that year. It shouldn't feel like a long time ago. Because it wasn't.

Don't get me wrong. I love all this. All that's going on right now. The comments I'm getting--even if fewer than I had before--and all the other interactions, I appreciate and enjoy and love them so, so much. And writing my newer fic projects are well exciting. But it just isn't the same anymore. I'm afraid it never will be.

(Maybe it has something to do with the lack of interactions lately. Maybe? I don't really know, either. I'm sure we're all well aware the fandom is past its peak, and with the current developments in the MCU I am frankly unsurprised, but I dunno.)

I guess that's part of the reason I've been less active lately. I've been inactive as a whole this year, admittedly, and disappearing far too often for far too long (and I notice some of my friends are, too). I just didn't get the same joy from being in a fandom like I had when I first started this blog, or my ao3 account.

In hindsight, I've probably been a little too dependent on fandom to provide me serotonin. The past few years have been hard, the years before that, too. Life just keeps kicking me in the arse time and time again. I guess I've been using fandom and fic writing as a coping mechanism, and once I've had my fill, the joy dies off to something a little more dull. Like a gum I've been chewing for too long that the sweetness has since worn off.

Honestly? I don't want it to be this way. I want to live without being so dependent on my presence online. I want to live without only knowing joy through internet interactions. I've got to learn to. It sounds silly, but it's true. (I think I may be slightly chronically online, oh no. x'D)

So naturally my first instinct is to distance myself a little. I contemplated quitting, but I can't do that. I don't see myself ever doing that, no matter how many times my brain convinces me that I might.

When this year started, I had set some goals for writing. One of them was to write for more whumptober prompts than I did last year or complete them all. I did like 21 prompts or something last year. Of 31. Within a little more than a month. While still balancing all the life stuff I had going on. This is, if not obvious, an extremely ambitious goal. I am not insane. I don't know what I was thinking. I can't possibly do that now, can I? Not with all the stuff that's been happening.

...

Can I?

...

Yeah, no. Definitely not.

See, that's another thing: writing. Probably the thing I'm trying to get at in this post but otherwise derailed completely from. Fuck my brain.

I'm sure many of you have noticed that I've been writing significantly less. I still post, obviously, but not as much as like, last year when the number of works I had went from a few to far too much. That had helped me improve quite a lot, actually, but those days I barely slept because I just insisted to replace my sleep time with Writing Shit For The Gays. It was pretty unhealthy now that I look back at it. My sleep schedule is still shit now but, yk. Some things just never change.

I was really, really caught up on wanting to be good at writing. Like, really good. I wanted to make awesome things. I wanted to write like a real fucking pro. Like all the more popular fandom authors I look up to. I want to be like the big dogs in fandom. It sounds so silly. I did everything; sprinting daily, setting a minimum of 500 words writing sessions every day, trying new writing styles, churning out works after works, writing for prompts and events and gifts and the like. I was enjoying it, yes, but was it really something I did for myself? Or was it because I wanted to please other people or impress other people for their validation, which is something I'm entirely too dependent of? Was it for the numbers?

Well. It was more for that than for me, I realised a little too late.

So yeah. Fuck wanting to be good. I want to write for the hell of it. I want to write something that's for me. Not what the majority of the fandom or other people want to read, but for me. Which is why I absolutely loved writing works like just a matter of time, how to kill a god, or how to become a god, because they're not meant for other people but myself. (Ironically that last work is a gift but, yk. I still liked it.) I know I joke about self-projecting a lot, but it's been seriously helping me rediscover the joy of writing that doesn't come from the incessant need to be good or perfect or focus on producing more and more and more. It makes me feel like a kid again. Also, I'm only realising this now but I'd rather get like 5 people who enjoy reading my works so much and express them to me rather than 100 people who silently thumbs up at me and then go away to consume another fic or demand more. (All this to say I still love interactions, it just shouldn't be my no. 1 priority to get them when writing fanfics.)

But yeah. None of those works are perfect. They're not meant to be. But they're mine. They're me. They represent me. And it's so, so great to feel that in writing. I've been so stuck up on being some sort of content machine. I'm doing this for myself, how could I forget? I've been saying this since the beginning, I don't know why I'm still struggling to do it. God. It's ridiculous.

Anyway. That's that. This has become a very long ramble. Thank you for listening to my Ted Talk. And for letting me waste your time, if you make it to the end of this post.

[vindieselsfacebook-blog]

okay after seeing your poll on the unpopular GG opinions I need to hear your thoughts on lane!!! please please elaborate because on first seeing your take I don't agree but I've also never thought about it so I would love to hear your opinion if you feel like it! :))

Ahhh first of all, omg thank you for caring to hear any of my rambling. :') Second of all, pheewwww boy do I have some unpopular Lane opinions lol.

My disclaimer at the top is that I like Lane! She gets so much interesting, flawed characterization that a lot of sidekicks in fiction don't. I can sound like a hater but I think there's this fascinating effect where fans either relate so closely with Lane, they project a lot onto her - to the point of pretending her flaws and mistakes just don't exist - or they flatly reduce her to her endearing strengths and root for her so much as an underdog, they don't engage with any deeper critique and honestly kind of infantilize her and don't hold her accountable for her choices.

Lane is so relatable because her experience speaks to folks growing up in similarly religious, oppressive, and/or culturally specific family units that maybe feel more authoritarian. This is where I must acknowledge that I'm an only child in a white (eastern European mostly) household where I never really clicked with my parents in most ways and was always kind of at peace with that fact. I've always struggled with fully understanding and empathizing with people (both irl and in fiction) who clearly feel so unhappy and/or oppressed by situations, but lack the courage to really do anything about it when it would be fully possible for them.

Lane's mom is cartoonishly restrictive of her and often downright cruel, but at the end of the day, Lane still cares too much what her mother thinks. She still wants to make her happy and internalizes those teachings instead of really pushing beyond them and rebelling like she acts like she wants to. She folds in on herself with a victim mentality constantly that frustrates me. As a kid, I totally get it, but once adulthood looms and she goes along with her mom's college choices for her, tries to make every friend and romantic interest delight in ridiculous charades to keep peace, and doesn't want to have sex before marriage, I get less sympathetic. Grow up, girl! Maybe it's because Lorelai's story is the 180 degree opposite of Lane's. I have so much love and admiration for Lorelai's bold choices, perhaps that's the root of my disconnect with Lane. Again - I totally get that this is shaped by my personal cultural upbringing.

Besides finding it hard to respect this desire to still be mommy's little girl when I don't think her mother has earned that OR that it's a personally satisfying pursuit for Lane, I find her boy-crazy obsessions dull and shallow. In she and Rory's brief S1 conflict where Lane feels ignored by Rory, I kind of can't help but take Rory's side because girl, I'm sorry, I'd be bored as shit hearing you ramble on and on about some dumb dude you don't even know because his hair is cute.

Although I resent the term so much these days, Lane fits the stereotype of "I'm not like other girls" MUCH more than either Rory or Lorelai in my opinion. She's always talking about dumb girls she doesn't like, girls in bands being her competition, etc. I get that's an easy coping mechanism for a girl like her who only has her taste as something she can feel superior to others about because her life is otherwise small, but still. The main characters get that critique but she's always exempt.

So many fans paint with a broad brush claiming Lane's a better friend to Rory than Rory is to her when I feel it's the reverse - Lane requires A LOT of emotional labor. I've heard folks claim she's just as smart - why couldn't she get into an Ivy, too? Well, to start, Lane wouldn't even go if she had the chance because she's too scared to be truly ambitious, she's not the main character of the show, and honestly, why do people think she's so smart? She's no dummy, but she's never portrayed as being especially good at school or interested in academics. That's where I see the projection creep in. People who relate to Lane are angry on behalf of her perceived wasted potential because they feel it about themselves or others they love.

Then of course, we all get mad about her quick marriage and pregnancy, but those are both fully Lane's choices. She's allegedly disagreed with her mom her entire life, but again chooses victimhood in refusing to have sex until marriage and still valuing the oppressive heteronormative life she's always been obsessed with. She was already making progress choosing her independent starving artist life at that point so she can't blame that choice on mommy. You're an adult - learn about contraception if you don't want to get pregnant! Or get an abortion! But no - Lane is a career self-saboteur. Like pushing Henry Cho away, Lane is addicted to struggling and hiding and keeps creating these circumstances for herself long after her childhood under her mom's thumb. She even needed her mom to plan a tour for her and her band.

AND ANOTHER THING (lol sorry, full drunk-uncle-ing now) but I don't think Dave Rygalski's willingness to lie, hide, and change himself for a girl's attention is healthy and gets waayyy too romanticized. Lane would be a nightmare girlfriend.

When fans share dreams of Lane moving to a bigger city, starting an all-girl band, or being successful in the music industry, I can't help but think those aspirations are far more out-of-character than people seem to think. She's just not that girl - and that's ok! Not everyone is. She ends up seemingly happy with her community and family and walks that line having a good relationship with her mom. We maybe hoped for more, but unfortunately she didn't. And just as with so many other things in Gilmore Girls, that rings so bittersweetly true to real life.